put away your almanacs, kids…

The FBI has issued a terror warning to police to look out for individuals carrying almanacs or maps, reports AP.

The warning was sent to 18,000 officers before Christmas. Almanacs, warns the FBI, may be used “to assist with target selection and pre-operational planning.” The Bureau acknowledges that there may be “legitimate recreational or commercial activities” that justify an individual carrying around a map or reference book.

The publisher of Old Farmers Almanac has vowed to co-operate with law enforcement agencies at every level. But it’s too late to contact the author of the United States best known almanac, as the suspect eluded authorities by dying 213 years ago.

Readers are advised to find and remove any portions of almanac that may be lying around on their hard disk. Particularly if it’s this one, from those subversive fifth columnists at Langley.

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